Every time I play someone good, the back of my mind itching for respect screams at me to play as fast as I can. My heart races and I go into a cold-sweat. The faster I go, the more I get off on it. Is this the speed and exhaustion high athletes get when they’re pushed to their limits? It’s AMAZING! Its like time is slowed down and I become the best I can ever be. Do I have all the answers? It doesn’t matter because I’ll make my own. Emotionally, I become a kid again without a care in the world but in my mind I become this cocky bastard frothing at the mouth for respect from my opponent.I’m not anxious at the thought of defeat but anxious I wont get to beat them with as much style as possible. How dare they challenge my dominance in my domain! How dare they even think they stand a chance head to head! Who do hell do they think they are? Its no longer about having fun stomping scrubs or takin’ the piss with friends. Its about pride. Its about respect and making a statement that my investment of time put into the game is ultimately more valuable than yours. And that, as ridiculous as it sounds, is exciting.