Yup. My bully told the entire school he was going to beat me up on my route home. Everyone showed up. I was a skinny little nerd teacher-pleaser, he was a grade ahead and at least 2 yrs older (Held back a year). He proceeded to pound me while everyone watched and cheered like it was a gladiator match. I got one good swing in and he went down, started crying and blubbering through his bloody nose. The biggest kid in school picked him up as if to dust him off… “Didn’t your mom teach you not to pick on someone smaller than you??!!” Then POW, smashed his face. Bully went down, stayed silent, just sort of gurgled. I was expelled. The admin who expelled me seemed incredulous that I had fucked this bullies face up so bad, even broke off a tooth. Of course, I didn’t snitch on the big guy and he was very popular so nobody else did either, the admin had to conclude all damage was from little ol’ Matt.

The kicker? Bully guy only got 2 days suspension as I had no visible damage (I had practice at dodging punches). Another admin tried to give ME a guilt trip for “picking on a kid from a troubled family”. Oh yeah? So am I mother fucker. Being the snarky fucker that I am, I rode my bike on the sidewalk right in front of the school every day of my suspension, slowly, not disrupting anything verbally, but everyone would notice. They called the cops. “Why aren’t you in school, kid?” I’m on my way to work right over there my friend”, which was true!

I gained a reputation as bad ass small dude not to be fucked with, nobody ever did bully me again though this incident definitely started me down a wrong path for quite a while. Had to keep up with that rep after all…

Sorry for the wall o’ text, never actually typed this nor even thought about it in decades ( I was 13, now 40’s), didn’t realize how long it would be!

P.S. Fuck Zero tolerance and the admins who enforce it!