I sexually identify as a Paesano. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of jumping over the green pipes and squishing goomba-scum. People say to me that a person being a paesano is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install spaghetti, marinara sauce and meatballs on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Paesano” and respect my right to eat mushrooms and 1-up needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a paesanophobe and need to check your food privilege. Thank you for being so understanding. It’s the Super Mario Bros. Super Show!

My Inspiration: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkWYP95WbbY